We all do it! Even if you dont want to admit it! Even if we try we all still keep on doing it. From the simplest things to people. Sometime we dont even mean it, it just come all naturally.
And I guess there is the problem (and now I dont want to go down the road of think before you speak, write, etc). Its programed into us. Of course there the ones that we mean with the best intentions or with warning out concern and love. But there are the ones we hear so often we accept them as truth and we dont even realize that by saying them we heart others.
I dont like to generalize, especially about people or situations, because they are all different and we are all different. Unfortunately most people only understand the pain caused by these phrases if they are a victim of them or is something outrageous like racism, sexism, or some other form of abuse and even then there are so many people who think its OK.
I know...I know...let it go, s/he doesn't know any better, but if we always let go these people will never learn. Lately this topic got under my skin, because it seems to be going around a bit too much.
Recently I was pulled away after paying in a supermarket, to show my bag, because I am a foreigner.
/and that means I steal....../
Not that long ago I heard a guy scream on the street from his car to the one in front of him, who was trying to park to a small space in a tight street that she must be a woman, because she cant park. (this happens a lot I know)
/if you are a woman it means you cant park, by the way it was a guy/
Today I read under a post a comment: lazy Greeks
/its the only thing people seem to hear about Greeks, so it must be true/
Somebody told a story about his friend and an unfortunate series of surgeries he had to go under, because the doctor screwed up, so all doctors are stupid and useless.
/one person makes a mistake and everybody else belonging to the same group or profession must be like him/
And the list can go on and on and on, and these are only "mild" ones.
I love chicken soup, and once I had a really bad one in a restaurant, it doesn't mean I will never eat chicken soup again, it doesn't even mean the chef was bad, or the ingredients, or that I will not eat in that restaurant again.
I'm sure like me a lot of people had a friend or more who betrayed them, but that doesn't mean that all people are bad, that you will never have an other friend.
The only generalization we should allow ourselves is that we are all humans. We can not even say anymore that we all have a heart or a pulse (there is a guy living with a fake heart, he doesn't have a pulse). That`s it. Other then that we are all different.
We all belong to so many groups, without even wanting to join in. We are women or men; white, yellow or black; parents or not; drivers or not; Eco friendly or not; meat eaters, vegan, vegetarians, etc; drinkers or non drinkers; smokers and non smokers; day walkers or night walkers; those of us who love movies and ones who dont; coffein drinkers and non drinkers; rule obeyers and rule bakers; rich or poor; and list can go on and on and on....did you join any of these clubs?
So why do people think its alright to heart the ones they dont think like you? What makes you better? NOTHING!
If you open the TV, watch a movie, read the net, or do anything practically now-days everything is full of hidden and very obvious messages and judgments. Things we should or shouldn't do. They repeat things over and over again up to the point that people take as a fact, like every day the sun comes up. And people dont even think about these anymore. I heard it on TV it must be true, or I read it in a magazine. We dont bother to actually take the time and look it up, whether if its true or not. We take it for granted.
And since everybody is doing it, you dont even question it if you should do it too or not?!
If you are living in your own country, you dont belong to some minority, you are an average person, who doesn't smoke, drink, drive a big car then probably you are less likely to be a victim of generalization except for being called a grey mouse. But those of use, who dont live like this, we are victims of insincere people every day.
Think before you speak, you never know who you are hurting. Don't generalize based on what you hear, not even based on one experience. Everybody and everything is different and they all deserve a chance to live by their choices, even if you dont agree with them. Accept people for who they are.
And I guess there is the problem (and now I dont want to go down the road of think before you speak, write, etc). Its programed into us. Of course there the ones that we mean with the best intentions or with warning out concern and love. But there are the ones we hear so often we accept them as truth and we dont even realize that by saying them we heart others.
I dont like to generalize, especially about people or situations, because they are all different and we are all different. Unfortunately most people only understand the pain caused by these phrases if they are a victim of them or is something outrageous like racism, sexism, or some other form of abuse and even then there are so many people who think its OK.
I know...I know...let it go, s/he doesn't know any better, but if we always let go these people will never learn. Lately this topic got under my skin, because it seems to be going around a bit too much.
Recently I was pulled away after paying in a supermarket, to show my bag, because I am a foreigner.
/and that means I steal....../
Not that long ago I heard a guy scream on the street from his car to the one in front of him, who was trying to park to a small space in a tight street that she must be a woman, because she cant park. (this happens a lot I know)
/if you are a woman it means you cant park, by the way it was a guy/
Today I read under a post a comment: lazy Greeks
/its the only thing people seem to hear about Greeks, so it must be true/
Somebody told a story about his friend and an unfortunate series of surgeries he had to go under, because the doctor screwed up, so all doctors are stupid and useless.
/one person makes a mistake and everybody else belonging to the same group or profession must be like him/
And the list can go on and on and on, and these are only "mild" ones.
I love chicken soup, and once I had a really bad one in a restaurant, it doesn't mean I will never eat chicken soup again, it doesn't even mean the chef was bad, or the ingredients, or that I will not eat in that restaurant again.
I'm sure like me a lot of people had a friend or more who betrayed them, but that doesn't mean that all people are bad, that you will never have an other friend.
The only generalization we should allow ourselves is that we are all humans. We can not even say anymore that we all have a heart or a pulse (there is a guy living with a fake heart, he doesn't have a pulse). That`s it. Other then that we are all different.
We all belong to so many groups, without even wanting to join in. We are women or men; white, yellow or black; parents or not; drivers or not; Eco friendly or not; meat eaters, vegan, vegetarians, etc; drinkers or non drinkers; smokers and non smokers; day walkers or night walkers; those of us who love movies and ones who dont; coffein drinkers and non drinkers; rule obeyers and rule bakers; rich or poor; and list can go on and on and on....did you join any of these clubs?
So why do people think its alright to heart the ones they dont think like you? What makes you better? NOTHING!
If you open the TV, watch a movie, read the net, or do anything practically now-days everything is full of hidden and very obvious messages and judgments. Things we should or shouldn't do. They repeat things over and over again up to the point that people take as a fact, like every day the sun comes up. And people dont even think about these anymore. I heard it on TV it must be true, or I read it in a magazine. We dont bother to actually take the time and look it up, whether if its true or not. We take it for granted.
And since everybody is doing it, you dont even question it if you should do it too or not?!
If you are living in your own country, you dont belong to some minority, you are an average person, who doesn't smoke, drink, drive a big car then probably you are less likely to be a victim of generalization except for being called a grey mouse. But those of use, who dont live like this, we are victims of insincere people every day.
Think before you speak, you never know who you are hurting. Don't generalize based on what you hear, not even based on one experience. Everybody and everything is different and they all deserve a chance to live by their choices, even if you dont agree with them. Accept people for who they are.